Toy Story Wood & Buzz

DO NOT BUY THIS FRAGRANCE I read Mr. Toes's review and thought it was a joke. It wasn't. I am currently hiding in my closet from thousands of women thirsting for my seed. I only sprayed the scent once. I thought it would be funny. It wasn't. I opened this can of worms with a faithful squirt two days ago. A casual stroll to Foxconn led to a trail of women following me, barely at first, but soon vigorously. After 12 hours of closet hiding, my will grows thin whilst the scent draws in more mates. So in my final breath, I say once more, do not buy this fragrance.

Let me start this review by saying that I have seen every toy story movie since Lasseters' 95's masterpiece, so I feel like I have the right to give a perceptive and accurate review of this masterful fragrance. I hate to say that I bought this fragrance expecting it to smell like a glorified version of Woody's plastic cowboy asshole, and didn't plan on saving it for long after purchasing it. The first time I sprayed it on, the scent pleasantly surprised me. Very citrusy and delightful for a summer/spring scene. I thought that this fragrance spraying on good was the end of the surprises, but oh dear god was I wrong. As I went throughout my day, the single spray of this stuff that I blasted onto my wrist just grew and grew in magnitude and scent. The citrusy spray turned into an all-encompassing smell of a rose garden in a Chinese sweatshop. It was perfect. Over the next few days, every time I ventured to the nearest store or mall all I could hear were the flirts and steps of the crowd of women trailing behind my dastardly seductive aroma. I'm starting to think that this is more what buzz smells like actually. I don't feel like woody gets too much play, he's too much of a little pussy. This fragrance emits the scent of a man whose joystick is not only as gargantuan as a horses, but as precise as an industrial-grade laser cutter. Truly an experience. If you ever wear this and don't plan on immediately making every woman in a 35-mile radius want to bear your children then I advise you to just spray it up in the air and walk through the cloud 15 seconds later. Other than that it's a great scent and gets the job done.